校园搞笑英语
1.We two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁啊！
2.How are you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你？
3.You don't bird me,I don't bird you.你不鸟我，我也不鸟你
4.You have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers ！together .你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！
5.Hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you havenothing to say,go home!!有事起奏，无事退朝
6.You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住！
7.Know is know noknow is noknow.知之为知之，不知为不知…
8.WATCH SISTER表妹
9.American Chinese not enough美中不足
10.heart flower angry open心花怒放
11.go past no mistake past走过路过，不要错过
12.小明：I am sorry!
老外：I am sorry too!
小明：I am sorry three!
老外：What are you sorry for?
小明：I am sorry five!
13.If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one!要钱没有，要命一条。
14.I call Li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大，今年25。
15.You have two down son。你有两下子。
16.as far as you go to die有多远，死多远！！！！
17.I give you face you don''t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face.给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸 。
18.Stop complaining! 别发牢骚!
19.You make me sick! 你真让我恶心!
20.What’s wrong with you? 你怎么回事?
21.You shouldn’t have done that! 你真不应该那样做!
22.You’re a jerk! 你是个废物/混球!
23.Don’t talk to me like that! 别那样和我说话!
24.Who do you think you are? 你以为你是谁?
25.What’s your problem? 你怎么回事啊?
26.I hate you! 我讨厌你!
27.I don’t want to see your face! 我不愿再见到你!
28.You’re crazy! 你疯了!
29.Are you insane/crazy/out of your mind? 你疯了吗?
30Don’t bother me. 别烦我。
31.Knock it off. 少来这一套。
32.Get out of my face. 从我面前消失!
33.Leave me alone. 走开。
34.Get lost。滚开!
35.Take a hike! 哪儿凉快哪儿歇着去吧。
36.You piss me off. 你气死我了。
37.It’s none of your business. 关你屁事!
38.What’s the meaning of this? 这是什么意思?
39.How dare you! 你敢!
40.Cut it out. 省省吧。
41.You stupid jerk! 你这蠢猪!
42.You have a lot of nerve. 脸皮真厚。
43.I’m fed up. 我厌倦了。
44.I can’t take it anymore. 我受不了了!
45.I’ve had enough of your garbage. 我听腻了你的废话。
46.Shut up! 闭嘴!
47.What do you want? 你想怎么样?
48.Do you know what time it is? 你知道现在都几点吗?
49.What were you thinking? 你脑子进水啊?
50.How can you say that? 你怎么可以这样说?
51.Who says? 谁说的?
52.That’s what you think! 那才是你脑子里想的!
53.Don’t look at me like that. 别那样看着我。
54.What did you say? 你说什么?
55.You are out of your mind. 你脑子有毛病!
56.You make me so mad。你气死我了啦。
57.Drop dead. 去死吧!
58.fuck off. 滚蛋。
59.Don’t give me your shit. 别跟我胡扯。
60.Don’t give me your excuses/ No more excuses. 别找借口。
61.You’re a pain in the ass. 你这讨厌鬼。
62.You’re an asshole. 你这缺德鬼。
63.You bastard! 你这杂种!
64.Get over yourself. 别自以为是。
65.You’re nothing to me. 你对我什么都不是。
66.It’s not my fault. 不是我的错。
67.You look guilty. 你看上去心虚。
67.I can’t help it. 我没办法。
68.That’s your problem. 那是你的问题。
69.I don’t want to hear it. 我不想听!
70.Get off my back. 少跟我罗嗦。
71.Give me a break. 饶了我吧。
72.Who do you think you’re talking to? 你以为你在跟谁说话?
73.Look at this mess! 看看这烂摊子!
74.You’re so careless. 你真粗心。
75.Why on earth didn’t you tell me the truth? 你到底为什么不跟我说实话?
76.I’m about to explode! 我肺都快要气炸了!
77.What a stupid idiot! 真是白痴一个!
78.I’m not going to put up with this! 我再也受不了啦!
79.I never want to see your face again! 我再也不要见到你!
80.That’s terrible. 真糟糕!
81.Just look at what you’ve done! 看看你都做了些什么!
82.I wish I had never met you. 我真后悔这辈子遇到你!
83.You’re a disgrace. 你真丢人!
84.I’ll never forgive you! 我永远都不会饶恕你!
85.Don’t nag me! 别在我面前唠叨!
86.I’m sick of it. 我都腻了。
87.You’re such a *****! 你这个婊子!
88.Stop screwing/ fooling/ messing around! 别鬼混了!
89.Mind your own business! 管好你自己的事!
90.You’re just a good for nothing bum! 你真是一个废物!/ 你一无是处!
91.You’ve gone too far! 你太过分了!
92.I loathe you! 我讨厌你!
93.I detest you! 我恨你!
94.Get the hell out of here! 滚开!
95.Don’t be that way! 别那样!
96.Can’t you do anything right? 成事不足,败事有余。
97.You’re impossible. 你真不可救药。
98.Don’t touch me! 别碰我!
99.Get away from me! 离我远一点儿!
100.Get out of my life. 我不愿再见到你。/ 从我的生活中消失吧。
101.You’re a joke! 你真是一个小丑!
102.Don’t give me your attitude. 别跟我摆架子。
103.You’ll be sorry. 你会后悔的。
104.We’re through. 我们完了!
105.Look at the mess you’ve made! 你搞得一团糟!
106.You’ve ruined everything. 全都让你搞砸了。
107.I can’t believe your never. 你好大的胆子!
108.You’re away too far. 你太过分了。
109.I can’t take you any more! 我再也受不了你啦!
110.I’m telling you for the last time! 我最后再告诉你一次!
111.I could kill you! 我宰了你!
112.That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard! 那是我听到的最愚蠢的事!
113.I can’t believe a word you say. 我才不信你呢!
114.You never tell the truth! 你从来就不说实话!
115.Don’t push me ! 别逼我!
116.Enough is enough! 够了够了!
国外英语笑话
117.Please don't feed the animals. If you have any food, please give it to the guard on duty.匈牙利动物园:请不要给动物喂食。如果您有食品,请喂给值班警卫。
118.If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.日本旅馆:如果您想调节您房间的温度,请控制您自己。
119.Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.挪威酒吧:女士们不要在酒吧里生孩子。
120.Fur coats made for ladies from their skins.瑞典皮货商店:为女士们制作的皮大衣,是用她们的皮制成的。
121.Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.香港牙科诊所:由最新的卫理公会教徒给您拔牙.
122.Drop your trousers here for best results.泰国的干洗店:在这里脱掉您的裤子,等待最好的结果.
123.Specialist in women and other diseases.意大利妇科诊所:我们是women和其他疾病的专家。
124.The manager has personally passed all water served here.墨西哥旅馆:旅馆经理将亲自为您撒尿。
125.We take your bags and send them in all directions.丹麦机场:我们将拿走您的行李,送往四面八方。
126.Welcome to the cemetery where famous Russian artists are buried daily except Thursday.俄国公墓:欢迎访问这个公墓,许多着名的俄国艺术家每天埋在这里,但星期四不埋。
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